Traveling Thoughts

When I was younger, and actually, to this day the rule probably still stands. I keep my room clean or mom will clean it for me.  I only saw this exercised once, but that’s all it took.  My mom went into my sister’s pigsty of a room and cleaned it out.  What was once an over flowing toybox was only a quarter of the way full when my mom left.  The desk drawers that were jam packed were now virtually empty.  Dust bunnies along with a world of other stuff that was creeping out from under the bed was no longer.  I’m fortunate to say that there’s maybe been only once that mom has threatened to clean my room and I was in there so fast cleaning it myself to her expectations that I was able to salvage 90% of my stuff. 

You’re probably wondering why this story is coming up now.  Well, it’s simple.  Never in our lifetimes has there been clothes allowed on our floors, and if there were clothes on our floors they were only there for mere moments, or a little longer on certain occassions.  Those mere moments were between us stripping and moving the clothes quickly to laundry baskets, or perhaps it was towels on the floor after we had gotten out of the shower and gotten dressed, if the towels weren’t hung, they were on their way to a basket.  The certain occassion, that was on laundry day.  When our laundry would go from the basket into piles to be thrown into the washer.  Even when mom did our laundry the piles were in front of the washer/dryer, but as we grew up and started helping her the piles were in our rooms lined up waiting for their turn in the washer.  This is why, of all days, this story gets told today.  I was doing laundry.

So, for all the parents that do have children whose floors are buried under a half of foot of laundry and never get seen, this is for you.

Does your childs room look like this:

Would you like it to look like this:

For a small fee, we can send you a scorpian that can make your dreams come true. 

Simply place the scorpian under their clothes when it’s time for them to do their laundry.  If you’re lucky, when they pick up their clothes it will be there, scare the living daylights out of them that a poisonous creature was living under their laundry and their room will be clean shortly there after.  If the scorpian isn’t there when they pick up their laundry, you’ve got some praying to do.  If someone get’s stung go directly to the ER.  We wouldn’t send you a lethal scorpian, but just as a precaution, it’s in your best interest to go to the ER.

A mother that truely loves her children, would never put them in danger, so this is a bad marketing plan.  The truth of it however, is that it would probably work.  Within moments of me finding the scorpian, first thinking it was fuzz and bending over to pick it up when it then unrolled it’s tail, I had dropped the laundry in a different location, grabbed a shoe and tried to kill it.  Those damn things don’t die easily, in fact Fred’s still with us.  He’s in the bottle that I chased him into with the shoe since he wouldn’t die.  Needless to say, my floor is spotless, all laundry has been removed from it.  And I can GUARANTEE you that there will never be a pile of laundry on my floor again.