Traveling Thoughts

Mmm, do you smell that? It’s the smell of a new cave, a cave that hasn’t been inhabited by another printer in 5 years. A cave that has been printer free because she didn’t feel the need to get one. Why own a printer when you can’t print at the University’s expense she says. That was all fine and dandy until she wanted to print in color or print pictures, then she was in trouble because her mom wasn’t so keen on sharing her printer. A little selfish with the ink she (the mom) was. But now, NOW, she has me, a printer/scanner/copier. I even take the photocards from her digital cameras or if she pleases she can plug the digital camera into me. Aren’t I cool? I’m The Dell Photo 926 All in One Printer.

PLUGGIN IN
Oh she’s not happy, she can’t find something. Oh, the USB cable she thinks I should’ve come with. Wait, why didn’t I come with a USB cable? Who on earth boxed me? Don’t they know that most households don’t have wireless printer adapters yet…wait, wait, she found one, it’s a good thing she keeps miscellaneous cables lying around that she has no clue what she’ll do with them. It’s even the right one, awesome, she can plug me into her laptop, I’m starting to feel at home. HEY LOOK!!! I’ve got a tail.

INSTALLATION

What is she doing now, she unplugged me from her laptop. What is that flying saucer thing she’s putting into her laptop, it says something about loading, oh, it’s my software, heh, that will help. It says loading…. waiting… waiting… waiting… sheesh, 5 minutes…*rolls eyes* She just hollared, like really hollered, “COREL!!! I don’t want COREL on my laptop, why didn’t it give me the option to install it. OR NOT INSTALL IT…That’s gonna have to come off here shortly…” Apparently, she wants options…she doesn’t want everything done herself…dumb human, she chose “install everything” it’s all her fault…she could’ve had options…

While it’s loading she’s pulled out the silver packages. Those contain my life fire. Without them, I can’t print for her. She’s got me open, my guts are there for all to see, I hate when I get opened up, I get all cold inside, it’s not the greatest of feelings. But then, as they put the ink in me and close me up, I come alive.

TEST PAGE PRINTING

It’s time to print a test page. Oh yeah, totally looking good. Well, I can’t see that it’s looking good, she’s got my eyes covered. Stupid Humans! But, she muttered something to another creature in the room about how it looks good. So it must look good, besides, I’m partial, so it’s a good thing she muttered something, it gives us a better clue about how she really feels.

REAL PRINTING

She’s ready to print (for real), she just plugged me back into the laptop. YEA!!! I get to print. This should be cool. Wait, what does that say, what is she printing, I can’t see. As it comes down the pike I can feel it, it feels all lame, it’s a one liner, “BEHOLD AS I BECOME A CATFISH” I don’t get it. A catfish, what is she trying to tell me…

SCANNING
Oh, hahahaha, that tickles, she just opened the lid to my scanner bed. She just put the sign she printed on the scanner bed, she cut it down though. What is she doing now, her face is approaching it. She’s closing her eyes, and the lid. What on earth. Wait, her eyes have opened, she just pressed the scan button, unbelievable, she’s scanning her face, oh come on, she’s drooling on me, well not quite but almost, wait, her cheeks just puffed up, she’s blowing air, almost like a raspberry, this is unacceptable scanner use…this is UNsuggested scanner use…hahaha, that tickles, stop it…

Oh no she dit-ten (that’s how it’s pronounced, I watch Shrek you know). I can’t believe she did that, it’s all Ted’s fault, the stuff he teaches is padawans (I saw it on YouTube). She catfished on my scanner bed. Sadly for her she could exhale slow enough but hard enough for her cheeks to be puffed against the screen the whole time I was scanning. But still, that’s pretty impressive. I mean, that whole catfish thing wasn’t meant for the scanner beds, but she pulled it off. I’ll give her that much credit. Heck, I’m the one that captured it. I’m the impressive one.

But she needs to get serious here, I am a printer, a scanner, and a copier. She needs to use me for what I am.
PHOTO CARDS
Dang! She listens well, she’s plugging in a card. I wonder what she’s going to print off… Oh she’s not impressed, she doesn’t know what picture on the card she wants to print because she can’t see them on my screen, so she’s having to print a proof. That makes her frown. I’m not the top of a line photo printer, but I am a photo printer. Ok, she’s got the proof and now she’s chosen an image from the sheet. She’s opening the scanner, and she’s got a clean clothe to wipe it down. Ahhhh…that feels so much better, no more saliva on me. Sweet here we go, printing pictures. She’s impressed with the picture quality. She’s bummed that she can’t say, “hey, print this picture from the card without printing a proof. ” she may have to read the directions to find out if she can do that, she thinks “the proof is ok to print but it wastes ink”

The picture on the right had no extra settings, the picture on the left had redeye and auto-enhanced. She likes the one on the left best. The one on the right looks washed out. (Although if you ask me the photo was overexposed to begin with) She’s scanned her progress in, now that she sees a real scan job, she’s not all that impressed. In fact, she’s downright depressed at the scan quality. She’s having problems with the fact that she’s going to have to break the manual out. She thinks (like all other things she uses) that this printer should be plug and play, no reading of manual required. But since things aren’t working as they should, she’s gonna break it out. Overall she’s giving me a 3 out of 5 stars, it makes me sad, but I can see where she’s coming from. I print well, she’ll give me 5 out of 5 on that one. Scanning I get a 2 out of 5 because the scan jobs I did just weren’t that great. And her frustration with photo printing gets me a 3 out of 5, she wants to be able to choose her pictures without printing a proof. 3 out of 5 is mediocre, but I’ll deal with it. I am a printer after all. Worse case scenario, the cave gets vacated, but I’m confident she’ll keep me around for printing, like I said, I did print well and that’s what printers do best :)

If you’re looking for a printer that you’re confident will print, The Dell Photo 926 All in One Printer will do the job. Plus it has the extras if you want to sit around and play. She’ll sit around and play another day…